I see people everyday. Sometimes I look at their lives and think they’re so much better than mine. It seems as though they’ve always got the opportunity to really live, rather than just exist. Every action of theirs appears to be more interesting; more intriguing than mine.
So when I look at my own life, it seems drab in comparison. Everything seems to be monotonous; the routine, the food, the city, even the people.
At that moment it is only but natural to ask, “Why?” Those three letters are then the ultimate question to which there is no satisfactory answer. But I continue to search for an answer. I explore every facet, every cranny, every possible alley the question could lead to. Every one of them is a dead-end.
My next predictable reaction would be to slam the wall with my fists and admit defeat, in a cloud of despair. The meticulous search wielded no result except the very thing I set out to quell: despair.
However, while I was on a quest of no avail, the life I had admired had not changed. It was still as enviable as it always had been. This heralded the need for a new strategy to even the colour of the grass on both sides.
That is what the light at the end of this tunnel was: what I admired was not another’s life itself. It was the way they lived it which made it so interesting.
I have a life too. The only reason I envied another was because I was choosing not to live, instead only to exist. Opportunity is this life itself, therefore I had it too. I just had to utilise it.
See you soon,